Joan L. DeBakey, 73

April 10, 2020

Joan Lyn DeBakey, 73, of Lancaster, tragically lost her battle with uterine cancer and passed away at Lancaster General Hospital on Good Friday, April 10, 2020 with her son Michael by her side holding her hand. Born in York she was the daughter of the late J. Lavere and Romaine (Fitzkee) Frick and wife to the late Michel Ibrahim DeBakey.

Joan graduated from West York Area High School and attended Millersville University where she received both her Bachelors and Masters degrees in Elementary Education. Inspired by her high school French teacher, she decided to apply to teach internationally after graduation and began her career as an educator at the International School in Brussels, Belgium. While there she met her Lebanese husband, Michel, through mutual friends and married after 3 months. They enjoyed 11 years of marriage until his untimely death in 1983. She returned to York and taught in the West York Area School District until the birth of her son. In 1988 she began teaching in the Solanco School District, first as a reading specialist and then as a second grade teacher, teaching for 25 years until her retirement in 2012.

Being a mother was her greatest joy. She poured her heart into her son Michael’s upbringing, immersing him in the best of literature, art, music, and travel. Together they visited 26 states and 7 countries: Canada, Scotland/United Kingdom, France, Belgium, Germany, Luxembourg and the Netherlands. When Michael married his wife Carina in 2014, Joan welcomed her like a daughter. Her love grew further when she became Grandmère to Madeline and then Genevieve. She cherished time spent babysitting and sharing experiences at the library, the Brandywine River Museum, and Winterthur Museum and Garden, and never passed up an opportunity to partake in booza, Arabic for ice cream.

Joan was a cherished friend to many, having friendships that spanned up to 4 decades. “To have a friend is to be a friend” was a motto Joan lived by. Those who knew her knew her love of reading and discussing a good book; all things Scottie dogs, having had two Scotties, Rob Roy and Duncan; and cooking delicious meals, including homemade soups and hummus, a recipe passed down from her Lebanese mother-in-law. No visit to “Chez Joan’s” was complete without a cuppa of tea. She loved Earl Grey the best.

Professionally, teaching was her passion. She greeted each child every day with a hug or a handshake and encouraged them to practice random acts of kindness. She took great pride in creating a curriculum that would combine literature, art, and music for unique learning experiences on the topics of Ancient Egypt, China and Chinese New Year, and even spiders! Drawing upon an extensive classroom library of children’s literature she inspired many students with a love of reading and introduced them to beloved classics, such as “The Wizard of Oz,” “Charlotte’s Web,” and “Little House on the Prairie.” Having taught for over 35 years, she touched the lives of countless children.

Joan was a member of the Woman’s Club of York, in which she moderated the book club, and a member of the Traditional Latin Mass Community at St. Joseph’s Catholic Church, having become a Catholic in 2008 along with her son Michael.

Joan’s death comes during the closing chapter of over a year and a half of medical treatments including two open back surgeries and involving roughly 10 hospitalizations for infections, half of
which were septic. These events occurred in three hospitals spanning the Lancaster and Philadelphia regions. Joan managed to endure each one of these maladies, ending every fight with a new scar and many an infectious smile. She spent much of the time choosing to forget her adversities, instead enjoying her “new normal” life with family and friends. While the tragic news of her passing brings her family intense sorrow, they are grateful that at no time was Joan in any pain, and she fell asleep quite peacefully on her own accord.

Joan is survived by her son, Michael Ibrahim DeBakey, his wife Carina, and their daughters, Madeline and Genevieve. She is also survived by her sister, Roxanne DelFrari, wife of Paul, a brother, John Frick, husband of Sharon, all of New Hampshire; niece and goddaughter Fiana Shaw, niece Kelley Pendleton, and nephew, Ben DelFrari; Mike and Claire Cavoto, parents of her daughter-in-law Carina, who welcomed her into their family and they in hers; and many beloved friends who feel her loss greatly. She was predeceased by her husband, Michel, parents Lavere and Romaine, grandmother Pansy “Mamie” Murphy, and aunt Pauline “Polly” Emig.

The DeBakey family would like to extend their sincere thanks and appreciation to the staff at The Glen at Willow Valley and the SmartLife VIA Willow Valley program. They would also like to invite family and friends to take this opportunity to remember that each day is truly a gift from God. We all relished every last second we had with Joan and wished that time would never end. She stands as an inspiration to us all, representing triumph over adversity, unconditional love, and resolute loyalty.

Due to the current circumstances surrounding COVID19, a Traditional Latin Requiem Mass at St. Joseph Catholic Church in Lancaster and interment at Mount Rose Cemetery in York will be held at a later date. In lieu of flowers, please have Traditional Latin Masses said for the repose of her soul. Masses can be requested from St. Joseph Church Rectory by calling (717) 397-6921.