Charles Franklin Gray, 92

August 26, 2021

Charles Franklin Gray (“Chuck”) the 3rd was born January 11, 1929 in Palmerton, PA. He was the son of Charles Franklin Gray Jr., a well-loved, generous entrepreneur with mixed ancestry and deep roots in Eastern Pennsylvania, and Florence Bobst, whose ancestors emigrated from Germany in the 1700’s and eventually settled Lansford, Pa. He joined a 20-year-older brother, Harold, on the cusp of the Great Depression. Descendant of farmers, miners and entrepreneurs in the economic turbulence of the depression, Chuck spent his early years moving around frequently. He inherited his father’s ingenuity; from raising Irish setters to managing a hotel to selling ice, his Father Charles was adept at changing his work to meet the needs of the times. Equally adaptable and adventurous, young Chuck enjoyed a childhood of exploring the wilderness of Pennsylvania, picking huckleberries, spotting rattlers and once, perhaps, a panther. Despite many family and life challenges, he was a natural alchemist, and could always “turn lead into gold.”

In high school, he began showing his trademark spunk and initiative. He was active in his high school Governors and Discussion Clubs, and participated in many activities: Orator (of which he was the winner), Band, Class Play, Home-Room Vice President and Panther (yearbook) staff. He dug graves to earn spending money, and was the first member of his family to attend university. He was valedictorian of his high school, and an exceptional writer with a genius IQ. His favorite author was Edgar Allen Poe. He was such a fan he used his grave digging skills when he attempted to move Poe’s grave from where he is buried in Baltimore to where he believed he would have wanted to be buried in Phoenix, Arizona.

Chuck attended Purdue University and graduated top of his class in Chemical Engineering. His brilliance was often creatively and somewhat naughtily expressed. Well into his married years he retained several books he checked out from other schools. Often writing his papers at the last minute, he crossed state lines to check out books he needed, that were unavailable at Purdue. His ability to charm the librarians was the key to his book acquisition. Needless to say, those books were never returned.

Following in his Father’s military steps (U.S Army, WWI), Chuck served as a Marine and often remembered this time as amongst his best. After his discharge he was hired as a salesman at Union Carbide. Despite working in a corporate environment, to which he dedicated his life, he was a maverick in the business world. He began researching biofuels early in his career, and was known for doing things his own, very ethical and very determined way, engendering a very loyal staff. He often wrote business cases for the Harvard School of Business.

Chuck met his wife-to-be at a cocktail party she threw in her Chicago apartment. He arrived with a date who was crazy about him; after meeting my Mom, Mary Jean Jakubowski, he went home with his date but returned early the next morning to have breakfast with Mary. Smitten, they were married within the year and vowed to never divorce and to always work through the inevitable challenges of marriage. Chuck and Mary brought Elizabeth Lynn Gray (“Amber”) and Charles F. Gray the 4th (“Chuck”) into the world with a promise of never forcing their profession, religion or politics. A fierce advocate for independent thinking, Chuck encouraged his grateful children to choose their own path and to be able to articulate their choice clearly. He was commonly heard saying “Believe in yourself: You have everything you need to succeed.” He was especially vocal about women’s rights, and always believed “the world would someday be run by women, and be better off for it.”

Chuck’s primary focus through his married and working life was his family. He was a dedicated and strong Father figure, equally disciplinarian and tender protector. He was ever patient in his Fatherly activities and duties, whether teaching his children to mow the lawn, shoot a target, throw a ball, write an opinion paper or train a family pet. After retirement from Union Carbide, he established Cotia’s (a Brazilian corporation) U.S.-based office as their Vice President, and then retired from business life altogether. Golf was a mainstay of his retirement years, and into his 80’s he still walked all 18 holes.

In his retirement years he generously volunteered and donated to a broad array of non-profits. Dear to his heart was Food for The Poor in Haiti, Wounded Warriors, and local homeless shelters and food banks in Lancaster, PA. He loved tutoring young children in reading and math, and took up photography in his seventies. Always a lover of the wilderness, his favorite vacations were fishing trips to Great Bear Lake in Canada, and various remote or exotic locations like Maine or Belize. He also loved a relaxing stay at a beach resort and his family has many beautiful memories in Beach Haven, NJ and Cape Cod, MA. He and Mary spent a good portion of their elder year winters in Destin or Siesta Key, FL. Their sand dollar and seashell collection is a treasured testimony to their enduring love. Well into their nineties, Mary and Chuck still held hands. Whether walking along the beach to gather these treasures, or sitting side by side in the garden at Willow Valley, their hands always touched.

Chuck leaves behind his two grateful children, Elizabeth and Chuck; grandchildren Ciara Lynn Gray and Charles Franklin Gray; and grand dogs Maxi, Bodhi, Tiki and Blake. Son in law Karl Ferguson and beloved cousins Barbara Jones and Lisa Train also survive him.

Charles Franklin Gray the 3rd’s fierce determination to succeed despite adversity; heartfelt and loyal devotion to family; generous ability to listen to views and ideas differing from his own; and renegade spirit are a beacon for all of us who are privileged and blessed to call him Father, Grandfather, Father in Law, or Uncle.
Father, you are deeply missed.